#21 Italiano Spiderman

Ok, so this is a cop out blog post. I'm giving you a video.. But it's a really good one. There is a 10 part series that follows this up. For those who have already seen it, it's no surprise. For those that haven't prepare for fun.

#20 Tropic Thunder

This afternoon we exercised our freedom of speech, and the power of capitalism and voted with our movie-going buck for the so-called offensive epic comedy "Tropic Thunder". I heard all the complaints from the mentally challenged community, and really felt like it was overblown. And it was. WAAAY overblown. Don't worry folks. The humor was equal opportunity in this film, and what was really being made fun of in this flick were the ACTORS playing mentally retarded characters, not the people themselves. And frankly, the actors deserve every bit of it. I won't say much more for fear of ruining the fun of the movie, but for once the politically correct knuckle heads that have nothing better to do than picket movies that they haven't even seen, really should just go home. Get over it. They seriously are missing the joke.

In this day and age, even "Blazzing Saddles" would have gotten condemned. For those who have missed the fun of that classic gem, here is a taste.

#19 Just stop.

http://view.break.com/542649 - Watch more free videos
This is another take on the ipod packaging spoof that Microsoft did. But this has it's own merits. Thanks to wejustlikeit.

#18 on the other hand

The new Star Trek reboot has me giddy as a school girl. I'm so excited about this long overdue reimagining of the series I can barely keep my pee in.

Battlestar Galactica proved to me that the old can improve when redone right. All it takes is the right visionary to pull it off. J.J. Abrams is the perfect man for the job. The only thing better I can imagine is having other notable directors helm the franchise. What would Spielberg do? Scorsese? Tarantino? Hitchcock?

Even after 5 series and 10 movies, I still want more. How does Star Trek do it?

Characters. Really that's all it boils down to. My favorite of the series, DS9 did the most to develop characters. The Next Generation Characters were easy to love too. While I haven't really seen the bulk of the other two series, what I have seen wasn't half bad. Captain Janeway, Medicine Woman got on my nerves a bit, and I kept expecting captain Archer to jump into another body and say "oh Boy", but other than that, I liked it.

But It's tough to argue with the original trio. Casting aside, the characters themselves have always been an impressive concept. I just hope the new actors do what they can to make them their own. The one thing the Star Wars prequels did get right, Ewan McGregor needs to repeat itself in each of the new castings.

I'll be buying my tickets. Happily.

#17 Who cares?!

In the summer of 1999, I was still a Star Wars fan. A BIG Star Wars fan. I was a nerd and proud of it. Three good friends and I were so eager to see Episode I, the first Star Wars to come out since we were little, that we teamed up to hold a spot in line overnight and get tickets to see the new epic first hand.

Nine years, and three disappointing epics later, the next in the series is on the docket, and I couldn't care less.

Where did the love go? Why haven't I any interest in this film?

Even though the animation looks impeccable, even though the action looks better than all three of the prequels put together, even though, in the end, I will probably shell out 4 bucks to see it, I feel so detached from this movie.

George Lucas, you have worn out your welcome. I need a trial separation. I need some space. Please don't call. Please don't send me flowers. Please don't offer to buy me dinner. You have hurt my feelings. I had so much faith in you. I gave you love and you betrayed my trust. Give me my money back. Give me my money back, you bitch.

For someone with every opportunity, George Lucas failed to keep hold of my imagination with the prequels. Every time I watch them, I dislike them more and more.

I will go see the cartoon. But I don't expect to like it.

#16 Make Toast

I'm fully aware everyone has probably already seen this. But it's just so damn funny and addictive, I couldn't resist.

#15 Vertigo

While we were in Salt Lake I discovered just how bad my vertigo is.

I have always been frightened of heights. When my parents took us on a jeep ride up the mountains in Colorado at the age of about 11, I wouldn't even get out of the car when we arrived at the top of a rounded peak. Even though there were no steep drops, I was unable to control my fear. That same trip, we went on a horseback ride and I screamed nearly the whole ride as the poor horse meandered along the steep and narrow trails. My parents claimed they didn't own me, and I've never heard the end of it since.

Flash forward to our honeymoon in London. Kristi and I toured Warwick Castle. We decided to walk and climb through the castles various towers and passageways. We climbed medieval stone staircases, so narrow and shallow, that I had to duck to get through. We couldn't move forward until the person in front of us did. Claustrophobics need not apply. When we squeezed our way to the top, the view was spectacular. Notches in the brick allowed you to walk around and enjoy different vistas of the english villa and countryside.

What I wasn't expecting, was the slope at the top of the tower. When you climbed out of the tunnel, you were in the center of the construction, and the floor sloped down towards the notched wall. I believe it was built that way for drainage. The effect though, was that at the outset of stepping on the tower floor, you were virtually higher up than the walls of the tower that protected you from falling just a few feet away. the situation made me very nervous. Kristi poked fun at me, and got the picture you see above.

In Salt Lake, I experienced my worst episode yet. I was watching the fireworks show from our third story balcony. It was quite the pleasurable show. Even though we were really far away, it was probably one of the most impressive fireworks displays I had ever seen. Soon we were joined by some of the other motel guests. A family with young children was watching the show next to us. The little boy, who really wasn't quite tall enough to see over the balcony wall, began to hoist himself up. For several minutes, he was pulling awkward chin-ups to gain a better view. With every lurch to the precarious position he made, my stomach did a dance. I gripped my chair, I tried not to watch. All I could manage to think was to imagine that he would straddle the wall and plummet to his three story death. My fear took over, and I went back into the room to get away.

Kristi probably had no idea why I was distressed, and thought I was being moody or something. But I was genuinely getting sick from the experience. What i found frustrating, was that I didn't mind the height on my own, but watching someone else teeter so close to the brink completely destroyed my composure.

After a bit, I went back out and the family had gone to bed. I was able to enjoy the rest of the show.